I Am Enough

This is a good remynder for maintaining balance. Too many times in my life I skirted the edge of the dark side by under-valuing myself and, sadly, declaring myself as "no good", as compared to "everyone else". I found it difficult to settle into being satisfied with who I am. When I finally said to myself, "Enough is enough" and that I preferred life over living with a dying soul, I was able to earnestly embark upon the path of spiritual growth. Step by step, year by year, moment by moment, the clouds of self-inflicted emotional warfare cleared by thinking. I can now accept that I am okay just the way I am. I not much better than anyone else, nor I am much worse. In fact, I am probably in the middle range... like most folks. I have a piece of folk art created from a sheet of rusty corrugated metal that has two figures eying each other, a devil and an angel. It says, "A little good, a little bad -- like most folk..." I am aware that I have good traits and bad; I have made good and not-so-good choices for my life. What matters is seeing myself through a clear lens: admitting my faults and shortcomings and working through them to be my best self but also to accept the gifts I offer the world. I am not merely one or the other; I am enough.

(In reviewing the paragraph, I noted I trended toward moralizing. That is only part of the message. It is about being feeling complete and content in this fast-moving, whirling world filled with endless opportunities and other people we perceive as super-achievers. The American culture is rampant with skewed demands for excellence gained by ever more cut-throat ego-centric competition. I am not dismissing right-sized goals for personal gain, but I know I lost appreciation of my value when I compared myself to others, resulting in the "less than" syndrome. I am NOT "less than"; I am enough!)